Chapter 85
Seeing that the Empress Dowager had nothing more to say, Qi Junmu rose to take his leave. In that moment, as he stood, both he and the Empress Dowager understood—they would not see each other again.
The Empress Dowager said, "Your Majesty is now without wife, without children, without kin or friends. Do you not feel lonely?"
It was almost laughable—this was the first time he had ever heard her ask whether he felt lonely. But the one who had once longed to hear those words had long since grown up and ceased to hope for anything from this relationship.
As he left, Qi Junmu said calmly, "Imperial Mother is ill—do not dwell on too many things. But rest assured, I do not feel lonely. My heart already has its home. The realm will not fall into chaos, and neither will my rear palace."
Behind him, the Empress Dowager was consumed by despair. She knew she would never again hold unchallenged power in the palace. And with so many long, slow days still stretching before her, she felt nothing but a cold dread seeping deep into her bones.
Qi Junmu walked away from the Empress Dowager's palace with a light step.
Since Shen Nian wasn't by his side, Qi Junmu chose to walk back instead of taking the palanquin. He kept Ruan Jiqing close for casual conversation, while the rest of the attendants trailed behind at a respectful distance.
As they walked, Qi Junmu suddenly remarked, "I have never truly looked at the scenery in this palace before. Seeing it now, it's quite lovely."
"The palace scenery is naturally the finest—otherwise, why would so many people risk everything to get in?" Ruan Jiqing replied with a smile.
Qi Junmu mused for a moment. "They all want to come in?"
Before Ruan Jiqing could nod in agreement, Qi Junmu sighed, "But today, Marquis Zhenbei does not want to."
Ruan Jiqing's words caught in his throat. He was speechless for a moment, then thought to himself: So the Emperor is missing Marquis Zhenbei. No wonder he's suddenly waxing poetic.
The Marquis has only just left the palace—could you really be missing him as if three autumns had passed in a day? But honestly, Your Majesty, if you miss him, just say it. Why all these roundabout words in front of me? Aren't your teeth aching from all that sweetness?
Qi Junmu, however, paid no mind to Ruan Jiqing's thoughts. Having made that rather sour remark, he found it dull and boarded his palanquin back to Quanhua Hall.
To his surprise, he saw Shen Nian waiting right at the gate of Quanhua Hall.
Qi Junmu thought he was seeing things. He blinked once, then again—but Shen Nian was still there.
A smile slipped onto his face without him realizing. He stepped down from the palanquin, reached out to steady Shen Nian before he could bow, and asked, "Why are you back so soon?"
"The matter was settled, so I returned," Shen Nian replied.
Qi Junmu pulled him inside the hall, where charcoal braziers kept the chill at bay.
He pressed Shen Nian down into a chair and looked down at him with a grin. "Was it because of that? Or was it because my Marquis Shen missed me?"
Shen Nian looked up, his eyes full of the man before him, and answered softly, "Naturally, it was because I missed Your Majesty."
Qi Junmu beamed. His usually cool features softened in that instant, warm and gentle. And through the daze, Shen Nian heard Qi Junmu say, "I missed you too."
---
On the third day of the eleventh month of the third year of Renqing, a heavy snow fell.
In the dead of night, candlelight wavered inside Qianhua Hall. Qi Junmu lay there, gazing leisurely at Shen Nian's gentle, weary face, and smiled.
No one knew how much time had passed before Shen Nian's brow furrowed slightly, and then he slowly opened his eyes.
The moment he saw the Emperor, he was fully awake: "Your Majesty hasn't slept?" His voice was unusually hoarse, for reasons best left unsaid.
Qi Junmu said, "My heart is too happy. I couldn't fall asleep."
Shen Nian shifted his body and let out a soft mm.
Qi Junmu was not lying when he said his heart was happy. He and Shen Nian had long understood each other's feelings, but in their daily interactions, they mostly discussed state affairs. Occasionally there might be a teasing word or two, but nothing that overstepped propriety.
The main reason was that Shen Nian was still in his mourning period. Though Qi Junmu had personally overridden custom and released him from the full rites, he still waited three full years until Shen Nian had formally laid aside his mourning clothes. Today, the two had drunk together without restraint—both to pay tribute to the past and to rejoice in the present.
And what followed came naturally. When two hearts were as one, even a single glance between them had been enough to spark joy.
There was one more thing: Qi Junmu had now lived past the date of his death in his previous life.
This had been weighing on Qi Junmu's mind all along. The closer that date drew, the more unsettled he felt. After all, no one wants to die if they can help it. Fortunately, in this life, he had someone by his side. Shen Nian had noticed many things but never pressed him with questions or comments.
That made Qi Junmu both happy and pained.
Happy that Shen Nian trusted him so completely; pained that this man kept everything bottled up inside, never asking or speaking of it.
"What is Your Majesty thinking about?" In the silence, Qi Junmu heard Shen Nian ask.
Qi Junmu looked at him and said, "How is it that you never ask me anything?"
Shen Nian's brow relaxed slightly. He gave a soft smile, his features warm and refined: "I trust Your Majesty."
"Then are you waiting for me to speak of it first?" Qi Junmu pressed.
Shen Nian shook his head. "It doesn't matter. Whether Your Majesty speaks of it or not, it's all the same. I have my own secrets too—I was thinking I'd tell you when we're old."
Hearing this, Qi Junmu let the matter go. He took Shen Nian's hand and said gently, "Very well. When we're old, we'll exchange our secrets."
Shen Nian hummed in agreement. He was tired and drowsy, so he murmured, "Your Majesty, let's sleep."
"Alright," Qi Junmu replied. The hall was not cold. The two lay close together, listening to each other's heartbeats, and slowly drifted off to sleep.
---
The next morning, Shen Nian woke first. the Emperor was still asleep.
In sleep, the Emperor looked gentle and harmless, his cold, snow-like features much softer. This was an expression that only Shen Nian ever got to see. Before his ministers and the entire court, the Emperor was always aloof, untouchable, and unreachable.
How fortunate, Shen Nian thought. He had plucked the moon itself from the sky.
The morning court session had already passed, yet Ruan Jiqing had not come to wake them. Shen Nian knew this must have been the Emperor's orders. He did not move, simply lying still and waiting for the Emperor to wake.
Shen Nian knew every plant, every object, every vessel in Qianhua Hall. Many of the items were placed in arrangements he favored, even though he had never explicitly said so.
In certain moments, the Emperor was truly a considerate and gentle person.
Shen Nian knew that recently, many officials had been submitting memorials urging the Emperor to hold a draft and fill the rear palace with consorts.
In the year following the great purge of the palace, the Emperor had cited the need to observe three years of mourning for Emperor Jing and had rejected the proposal. This year, he could no longer avoid it—but Shen Nian was not worried in the least.
Within the palace, the number of people who knew about his relationship with the Emperor was neither large nor small.
Several of the attendants in Qianhua Hall were in the know, including Ruan Jiqing and Xia Guo, along with a few others. But they all understood the Emperor's methods, and not a single loose word ever crossed their lips.
Beyond them, there was Prince Jin, Qi Junzhuo, who also knew of his relationship with the Emperor.
The Emperor had never been secretive about it in front of Prince Jin. At first, Qi Junzhuo had not thought much of it—he simply assumed the Emperor and Shen Nian were close, their ruler-minister relationship harmonious, unlike the mutual suspicion and exploitation others imagined.
It was only later, when he happened to catch sight of their hands clasped together, that Qi Junzhuo suddenly understood the deeper meaning.
And for that, Qi Junzhuo had come to find Shen Nian.
No comments:
Post a Comment