Chapter 119
Fang Zichen was frightened and struggled to get up in a panic: "What the hell are you doing?"
Li Yisheng laughed and said: "Let you listen to my heartbeat! Is it thumping?"
Fang Zichen didn't care if it was thumping or clanging, he just wanted to punch this person right now.
"Let me go. Men should not touch other men."
Li Yisheng let go, laughing without a hint of embarrassment: "Is there any more food? I saw you eating very happily earlier, and I'm a bit hungry."
Fang Zichen sat opposite him without moving, his chest heaving. He was truly annoyed, like a ball of fire trapped in his chest. It took him a while to suppress that anger: "Before you talk to people, could you please not squint your eyes like that?"
It felt disrespectful, as if he was looking down on people.
Li Yisheng laughed: "......I'm not squinting!"
Fang Zichen imitated his expression: "You're not squinting? Can your eyes really look like this? Do you just have very narrow eyes?"
"Yes," Who knew Li Yisheng would actually nod and say: "My eyes are just naturally like this!"
"......" Fang Zichen felt he had never been so speechless in his life: "Really? Open your eyes wide and let me see."
Li Yisheng raised his eyebrows, the skin on his forehead wrinkling together. It was clear he was trying hard to open his eyes wide. Unfortunately, his eyes showed no change, still like two lines.
If someone was nearsighted and stood two meters away, they probably wouldn't be able to see his eyes at all.
......They were really, truly just lines.
Fang Zichen was silent for a long moment before finally saying with difficulty: "......Your eyes are a bit severely narrow!!"
Li Yisheng wanted food. Fang Zichen gave it to him. The two sat around the fire and weren't in a hurry to sleep anymore. They started exchanging names and investigating each other's family backgrounds, asking about eighteen generations of ancestors.
Fang Zichen took the initiative and asked first: "Where are you from?"
Li Yisheng said: "From Huinan Town. How about you?"
"I'm from Fu'an Town," Fang Zichen said: "Are you also heading to the prefectural city?"
"Mm," Li Yisheng's mouth was stuffed full of pancake as he nodded and said: "The imperial exam is in a few days."
Fang Zichen suddenly understood: "Oh! You're going to take the imperial exam, right!"
Li Yisheng sighed, his eyes drooping, and said without much inflection: "No, I'm just going to have a look. They won't let me take it."
'They' referred to the minor officials responsible for verifying credentials and checking candidates' personal information before the exam.
Fang Zichen was speechless.
During the Tongsheng exam, he had experienced it deeply.
Many people say the modern world is a place that judges by appearance, that being good-looking gives you an advantage in everything.
Actually, the modern time is much better in that regard. Ancient times were the ones that truly judged by appearance. If your physique and looks weren't up to standard, even taking the imperial exams was difficult, let alone becoming an official. Here in Da Xia, the requirements for candidates' appearances were extremely strict.
In the Da Xia imperial examinations, candidates who passed the final, palace-level exam received the Jinshi title. The top three scorers among them were then honored with the special titles of Zhuangyuan, Bangyan, and Tanhua. However, earning these prestigious academic honors did not mean an automatic official appointment. They still had to pass the Ministry of Personnel's official selection gate, which was also the most important gate. Only those who passed this gate could obtain an official position and assume their post.
The main criteria for the Ministry of Personnel's official selection were "Shen, Yan, Shu, Pan" (physique, speech, calligraphy, judgment). Physical appearance was ranked first. The court believed that officials were the face of the court, representing its dignity and authority, so the requirements for officials' physiques and appearances were relatively strict. Being too tall, too short, too fat, too ugly, or having poor eloquence could all affect a candidate's official career.
During the registration for the county exam, several people were not allowed to take the exam because of their unsatisfactory appearance.
The blow was too great. Those few people cried and wailed at the government office entrance, making a huge commotion, and were eventually chased away by soldiers carrying broadswords.
Li Yisheng's eyes... offered no hope for the imperial exams.
Fang Zichen didn't know how to comfort him. Noticing the medicine chest beside him, he changed the subject and asked: "Are you an apprentice at a medical hall?"
It wasn't that he looked down on him, but Li Yisheng looked young, only around twenty or twenty-one. Most physicians these days were older.
Li Yisheng replied: "No, I've already completed my apprenticeship long ago."
Fang Zichen: "......" Alright, I've underestimated him.
Fang Zichen smiled: "Then your medical skills must be quite remarkable!"
"Just passable!" Li Yisheng laughed modestly: "Just a little bit better than Bian Que."
Fang Zichen: "......"
Does he brag without even drafting a script?
Better than Bian Que?
[Bian Que (扁鹊): a renowned physician during China's Warring States period, traditionally credited as an early master of pulse diagnosis and medical examination, who became a legendary figure in the history of Chinese medicine.]
Even during that period of "how bold the people are, how productive the land is," when they feared being unable to achieve anything more than they feared being unable to imagine it, people probably didn't dare to talk like that.
[人有多大膽地有多大産 (rén yǒu duō dà dǎn dì yǒu duō dà chǎn): lit. How bold the people are, how productive the land is; A slogan from the Great Leap Forward (1958-1962) asserting that human daring alone could make the land infinitely productive, leading to disastrous policy decisions.]
Li Yisheng, having eaten his fill and satisfied materially, now began to pursue the spiritual world.
"Zichen, do you have any younger sisters?"
The question was abrupt. Fang Zichen blinked and shook his head: "No."
Li Yisheng asked again: "Any ger younger brothers?"
Fang Zichen: "Also no."
No younger sisters or brothers... well, older sisters or brothers would do too!
Li Yisheng asked again, his tiny eyes gleaming with a bright light. Fang Zichen caught on: "Whether I have them or not, what do you want to do?"
Li Yisheng moved closer, brushing the hair from his forehead: "I just think you're quite good-looking. If you have siblings, they must be not bad either. What do you think of me? I don't have many other virtues, just that I'm a bit handsome and dashing, accomplished at a young age, charming and elegant, with some family property... So, if no younger sisters or brothers, do you have an older sister?"
Fang Zichen listened, speechless.
He always thought it was good for a person to be confident, but when confidence overflowed to the point of losing touch with reality, not knowing one's own weight, he really felt like giving him a couple of kicks to make him recognize what reality was.
Li Yisheng chattered on and on. Fang Zichen, extremely annoyed, said: "I have a hammer, do you want it?"
"Uh~" Li Yisheng wanted to politely refuse: "Then let's just..." Before the words 'forget it' could leave his mouth, Fang Zichen looked at him and suddenly said coolly: "Oh there's Xiao Hua (Little Flower), quite pretty. Want her?"
The fire was rekindled. Li Yisheng tentatively asked: "Xiao Hua is..."
Fang Zichen chuckled and fabricated: "She's the little sow my fulang raises!"
Li Yisheng: "......"
A basin of cold water poured over his head, extinguishing the fire completely.
Li Yisheng glared fiercely at Fang Zichen. Fang Zichen grinned, leaned over, and put an arm around his shoulder.
"In this life of eighty or ninety years, if one can have a stirring, cross-species romance, then it would not be in vain to have walked this earth." Fang Zichen recommended sincerely: "My Xiao Hua is quite good. Stout and sturdy, with lush hair, twelve piglets in one litter, far surpassing other sows her age. She's a top-notch expert for building wealth and reaching a well-off life. You must know, choosing the right wife is the ultimate investment for a man. A smart man understands the importance of having a good wife. When marrying a wife, choose virtue. So, do you want to consider it? Pass this village, and you won't find this shop again. It's only because I get along with you that I'm willing to part with my treasure. For ordinary people, I wouldn't even bother."
[过了这个村，没这个店 (guò le zhè ge cūn, méi zhè ge diàn): lit. pass this village and you won't find this shop; fig. if you miss this opportunity, you won't get another one.]
Li Yisheng: "......" Actually, we don't get along that well.
He turned around, presenting his backside to Fang Zichen, feeling wronged.
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